IlliniDumps

Yeah, these bathrooms are very small, very disgusting, and quite honestly, filled with raccoons. It makes for a great time coping not only with the uncleanliness, disgusting people AND my finals, but fighting off rabid raccoons with one hand while trying to poop with the other really irks me.

If you want to catch an epic case of hepatitis b, please take a visit to Espresso Royale's toilet stalls. Please avoid otherwise.

gross. do they ever clean it?

The bathrooms are so bad that the janitors have to wear face masks when cleaning them.

The bathrooms by the Espresso Royale are notoriously gross. Stalls don't close properly, no in-cubicle waste box for feminine products, and people always manage to leave the door open, allowing everyone a view into the bathroom. The other options are located on the lower level, one directly below Espresso, and the other on the opposite side. These are much more private, thus cleaner. However, they are creepy and one must be careful not to walk in on some rando couple's (disgusting) bathroom hook-up session. My suggestion? If you have time, go through the tunnel to the main library.

This is where I discovered that broken glass can actually be used as lubricant.

It's hard to describe the Undergraduate Library men's bathroom with mere words. It's something that needs to be experienced. As an unavoidably frequent visitor of this cesspool, I can say that you may not notice the first time, the second or the tenth, but over time, that small hole in your heart will grow and grow. You'll wonder: why am I so depressed? It's because of this bathroom. The rating system isn't exactly fair for this bathroom. Beyond smell and visible cleanliness, it seems a normal bathroom. However, the Undergrad bathroom is a gathering place for the biggest and most inhumane neanderthals on campus. They grunt, moan and fart disgustingly without regard for surrounding patrons. They unzip their pants as soon as they walk through the door ON THE WAY to the toilet, and usually zip them back up once they've reached the sinks (well, the ones that actually wash their hands). As far as smell, I can say this bathroom doesn't smell THAT bad, but the people who frequent this place...smelliest mother****ers on campus. Cleanliness: a joke. It's not even the janitors' fault--who could deal with this? There's a booger that somebody smeared above a urinal that's sat there for as long as I can remember. Rarely does somebody actually flush a toilet, often times splashing their piss and shit amongst the scattered debris of paper towels and abused newspapers. I wish crowdedness could have a negative number option. Often the bathroom will become physically crowded between passing periods, absolutely stuffed with meatheads with no manners and those weird people talking to themselves you see around campus. But the atmosphere...the sense of experiencing the worst bathroom in a 50 mile radius...the grunts, the moans...it surrounds you, creating this disgusting aura you can't escape and leaving you helpless. Every time I leave this wretched place, I fall to the ground, grasp my chest and gasp for air. You'll never realize how clean and filling air can be until this moment. I would tell you to stay away, but how many people can claim they've been to the most disgusting bathroom ever? You NEED to experience this. So, for the next few days, just try it out. Get a feel for the place. Become one with it...and then never go back. For the love of God.......never go back.

always smells like piss. Also, there's sometimes people watching you while you piss.

I'd rather poop in a ditch surrounded by angry hornets and starved bears than poop there again.

This place was absolutely disgusting. Might I suggest shitting outside instead?